rhythmaning: (bottle)
[personal profile] rhythmaning
I had a friend visiting last weekend, and we decided we wanted a pizza. I let slip that I had never ordered a pizza delivered to the door before.

I had eaten pizza carried by a spotty delivery boy riding a scooter, sure; I had even decided quite which pizza I wanted. (This was never difficult; I usually order the same pizza, more or less: mushroom, with or without ham. Make a note of that for next time I’m around, eating your pizza.) But I had never actually ordered pizza over the phone, to be delivered right to my door.

Part of this is because of where I have lived – pretty near pizza places, really. And also because I have an inherent dislike of the delivery chains – I just don’t trust Dominos or Pizza Hut. (The Pizza Hut ads are nauseating, sufficient to make me stay as far away from a Pizza Hut outlet as I possibly can.) I’d rather walk down to a pizza outlet and get a carry-out.

My friend thought this was quite remarkable: to get to my age1 and never having ordered a pizza delivery.

As they said this, I realised that this might have been sufficient to win the recent game of Humiliation played amongst my friends list. But it didn’t occur to me at the time – I mean, as far as I am concerned, not ordering pizza seems absolutely perfectly fucking normal.

To save my blushes, my friend ordered the pizza for me. So I have still never ordered a pizza to be delivered. Please remember this next time someone suggests a game of Humiliation.

And for the game after that, I have never hired a video. Again, I have watched hire videos – indeed, I have watched hire videos and eaten pizza delivered buy a spotty guy on a scooter at the same time. I have even been to the video store with my mate G and chosen the video (much to his disdain, his wife and I have a similar taste in videos; though I also like smash-em-ups, too). But I have never hired one myself.

1My brother is 50 today. He has never ordered a pizza delivery either. I’ve got a couple of years to go, but I do not anticipate breaking my duck, now that I have waited so long.
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June 2017


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